Penultimate Postravaganza (Part 9)

Then we came to the end.  I'm tempted to do this entire post in the first person plural as a tribute, but then people would probably just think I was aping Will Leitch.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

- - - - - - -

Gabe,

Since this is my last post in this little series, let me start by thanking you for the back-and-forth.  It's been fun.  Hope it's been entertaining to read as well.

Housekeeping first.  Yes, I admit the reputation of Eagles fans can, in the right situations, be rather cool.  Of the two dominant strains of Eagles' fandom -- 1) hard-core, 2) self-pitying -- [the former] is by far the more appealing. 

I just despise the tendency of national commentators to use that reputation as a crutch to score easy points.  It's lazy and intellectually weak-sauced.

With that said, I was amazed while watching the NBA playoffs to see how hard the Boston fans were rooting for Ray Allen during his struggles.  The place went nuts every time he managed so much as a bounce pass to an open teammate without turning the ball over.  Of course, Allen rebounded in a big way later in the playoffs and ended up being an important contributor to the championship.

One can't help but wonder if the same result would have occurred in a town where the only cheers he heard would have been when he walked back to the bench.

As for the arrogance thing, the key point I've tried to make is NOT that Reid / McNabb are any different than any other coach / QB pairing in this league.  I don't think it's possible to succeed at that level without going to bed every night feeling pretty cocky about how you do things.

The problem for Andy is that that's all we see from him.  All signs point to Reid being a good, (relatively) humble, interesting and humorous individual, it's just that he locks that part away any time the microphones are on.  I realize that's his way of coping with this job and also how he thinks he can best win football games, but the end result is that no one cuts him any slack based on how good a guy he is. 

I should mention at this point that I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS AT ALL.  I like Reid, I think he's an excellent coach and I hope he's here for the next 10 years.  But I think it explains why a guy who's won so many games in this town has to deal with the kind of crap he takes.

But let's consider your hypothetical and say he moves on after this season.  Who would I want to see as coach?  The answer, I think ... depends.

A couple years ago, I would have been right there with you on the Jon Gruden thing.  The guy has a great offensive mind, he's a perfect fit for a veteran team that needs a little bit of edge to get over the hump (see Bay, Tampa), and he would eat this town for lunch. 

My problem, however, is that 1) I'm not sure "veteran team needing an edge" is a good description of where this franchise is right now and 2) I think there's a very good chance Gruden would completely destroy Kevin Kolb.

Whatever Gruden's strengths may be, it's hard to argue that he hasn't completely jacked up his quarterback situation in Florida, to the point that he may only have been saved by the magic that is The Jeff Garcia Experience.  And now even Garcia is pissed at him. 

Do we really want to hand the keys to yet another promising young quarterback to Gruden, with the knowledge that it would likely lead to lots of jerking the guy around, playing AJ Feeley, benching AJ Feeley, and endless rumors about trying to lure McNabb back from Chicago?  I don't think so.

Bottom line:  while he might be the guy to give you the best crack at a championship right way, it could come at the cost of ruining your potential franchise quarterback for the next 10 years.  I'm not sure that's the smartest risk to take.

Jeff Fisher?  Meh.  I realize he's one of the apostles, but to me that's a blah choice.  Only if everyone else said no.

The Ryans?  I'll let you have your dreams.

As for my picks, I'll give you my top and bottom three.  First the no-way-in-hell-ers:

3.  Dick Vermeil.  You know the drumbeat would start.  I like Vermeil and I think he's a great coach, but I don't like the idea of picking a short-timer.  Stability on the sidelines is important.

2.  Brad Childress.  Looks to an outsider like all he's done is turn around a bottom-feeding franchise in Minnesota while also having the foresight to draft the best running back we've seen come out of college in quite some time.  So why does everyone in at least three states hate his guts?  Seems weird.  He's also not the kind of guy who passes the split-screen coach's test the Sports Guy is always talking about.

1.  Marty Mornhinweg.  I realize Andy Reid thinks he's a great coach.  Fine.  But to me he just seems like a pale imitation of Reid himself.  I'm a big fan of the original, I'm just not convinced that hiring the Mini Me version is the answer. 

Now, for the good ones, I'm a big fan of John Harbaugh as well.  Whatever it is that guys like Marty and Childress don't have, he seems to exude in spades.  But the problem is that he's not going to be available any time soon unless things completely blow up for him in his new gig ... which might change my opinion of him slightly as well.

3.  Jim Johnson.  I understand the problems with this choice.  You could even argue that by doing this you would be going down a notch at both the head coach and defensive coordinator positions.  But hear me out.

Do you think the Eagles have a good thing going and should strive for continuity?  Johnson gives you that.  He's been here forever, has the respect of every guy in the locker room, and wouldn't be looking to change things up too much.  He might even consider running the ball more often when he has a lead in the fourth quarter.

On the other hand, are you a little tired of the way Reid runs things?  Think the team would benefit from a guy with a bit more fire?  Well Jim Johnson is your man.  He's the one coach on the staff who will tell you point-blank which guy screwed up out there.  He's also got a reputation of being a hardass on players who don't do things the right way.  If Lurie is looking for a little bit more of a "bad cop" from his head coach, Johnson is the pick.

There's also something to be said for having earned your chance.

2.  Jason Garrett.  Yes.  I know.  But if we're just picking names out of a hat here, Garrett has to be in the mix.  Not only is he by all accounts a great offensive mind, he perfectly fits the mold of a guy you could hire and then set up for the next 10 years.  He's exactly the kind of coach I'd love to see Kevin Kolb play his career under.  And you can't underrate how bad this signing would be for the Cowboys.  That's a win-win-win all the way around.

1.  Bill Cowher.  And my number one guy is sitting out there right now, just waiting for a phone call.  Cowher is the perfect pick:

• Fits the franchise's self-image;
• Track record of success;
• Immediate respect from players;
• Has a ring and can tell fans to shut the hell up;
• Smash-mouth background that would play well in Philly but also be a nice change of pace for this team;
• Understands PA; and,
• Has his offensive coordinator already on staff.

The only thing I don't like about this choice is that I'm still hoping he'll go to Penn State instead.

And so with that, I'll let you have the last word... 

...unless my self-control in that regard is no better than it was in not responding to comments.