Monday Eagles Hangover: You Gotta Kill A Mosquito With An Axe
Posted by BountyBowl
Let us start with a quick discussion of how we'll all remember yesterday's disappointing loss to the Tennessee Titans. It seems only appropriate to take a moment to reflect on how we'll mentally file this game if only because I can remember the last two times that the Eagles lost to the Titans fairly crisply:
(1) 2002 Edition. This was the season opener, also on the road. I can't immediately recall too many of the details of the actual game, but I do remember that one of my roommates at the time was almost-but-not-quite "seeing" this woman (for at least the previous weekend and a half) and she claimed to be a Titans fan. I do not recall this woman's name, such is the depth of the relationship that she and my roommate enjoyed. Shame on me. Anyway, she decided to watch this game in our apartment and on our television and cheered loudly for the wrong team throughout. She and my roommate did not "see" each other for much longer (unrelated to the result of this game; he's a Giants fan). Regardless, a thousand curses on her and her descendents.
(2) 2006 Edition. This was the day after my buddy's wedding where I received an Andre Waters jersey as a groomsmen gift (everyone got a different retro jersey). Then Dunavin blew out his knee and Andre Waters committed suicide a day later. Not a happy day.
The 2010 Edition will quite obviously and justifiably be known as the Kenny Britt Game. Certainly we tend to focus on our side of the game, and there is certainly much to discuss there. But in 8 years I suspect we'll all remember yesterday as the day that Kenny Britt just singlehandedly destroyed the Eagles. We'll gloss over the details regarding it coming the day after the Phils got knocked out of the NLCS, or that it was yet another Andy Reid loss before a bye week, or that the Birds didn't have DeSean Jackson or Michael Vick in the lineup. It'll just be the Kenny Britt Game.
Your afternoon-after story lines and bullet points:
(a) How double-teaming Kenny Britt with Allen doesn't really work if both he and Hobbs are still 15 yards away from Britt at all times;
(b) Discussing whether or not it would help if Asante Samuel started shadowing Britt one-on-one for at least the rest of the fourth quarter;
(c) Discussing whether or not Sean McDermott would even notice if Asante Samuel started shadowing Britt one-on-one for the rest of the fourth quarter;
(d) Whispering about strategies whereby they could go over and convince Jorrick Calvin to somehow do something even worse than getting repeatedly torched by Kenny Britt and Kerry Collins so that maybe this game wasn't completely on the DBs.
The Preferred Method For Killing Mosquitoes. Apart from an oblique "I was supposed to have more help over the top the one time I got burnt by Kenny Britt" offering by Ellis Hobbs, those most responsible for the Birds' meltdown in the secondary yesterday dutifully took questions from reporters following a pretty embarrassing loss. I especially enjoyed the mixed metaphor-laden explanation from Samuel regarding what the team needs to do to improve: "We just need to kill a mosquito with an axe. Don't give them no breathing room, just put our foot on the gas." Personally, I've got a vision of someone examining the blade of their axe for evidence of a killed mosquito before getting into the driver's seat of their car and speeding off. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THE EAGLES NEED.
In Case You Were Worried I Would Go Easy On Kenny Britt. Britt was involved in a bar fight on Thursday night where a friend of his is alleged to have punched a man and wrestled that man to the ground, at which point Britt allegedly joined the fracas and repeatedly punched the downed man. Chris Johnson was also at the bar, but is said to have tried to act as a peacemaker. It was later revealed that the man on the ground was Ellis Hobbs.
The Guy Who Didn't Have A Terrible Day. In the midst of the awfulness of the Eagles' loss, let's not forget that Eagles rookie wide receiver Riley Cooper hosted a pretty terrific coming-out party at LP field. While plenty of other players came up small in their chosen moments (and we have to count Jeremy Maclin and Mike McGlynn on that list as well as the aforementioned DBs and Jorrick Calvin), Cooper's reverse-interception on an underthrown ball from Kolb and TD catch a few plays later really stood out. Certainly it leads me to be a bit more bullish than I had been on Sunshine. I assume Marty Mornhinweg is similarly bullish, owing mostly to the fact that he appears set to give Riley a handlebar-mustache smooch there on the sidelines. Also, Riley Cooper was Tim Tebow's roommate at Florida. That's THE Tim Tebow.
(I stole that joke from Derek, admittedly. Other jokes I would steal if I had more time: the bit in the comments on Tommy's piece from this morning about the penalties being AGGRESSIVE penalties -- those are good, because they count for fewer yards when Andy Reid reviews the game tape; mean-spirited Kerry Collins jokes -- can't do those what with him destroying us and winning the game.)
In A Week When The NFL Reminded Everyone Not To Concuss Each Other Quite So Violently.... You have to hand it to King Dunlap for trying to pull Cortland Finnegan's head clean off by the facemask after an extremely annoying pick six on the game's final play (annoying because the Eagles kind of quit on the play and also because Finnegan is a jerk). Video here. Also, WTF with the guy in the Celek jersey and green hair congratulating Finnegan after he jumped into the stands? Perhaps he was secretly trying to inject him with poison?
The Game That Really Came To Mind As This One Unraveled. Bears 19, Eagles 16 from October, 2007. That was a closer game, mind you, but the Birds still coughed up a winnable game to a veteran QB.
Oh, Well, We'll Have To Mention It Eventually. If nothing else, the bed-poopage from the Birds in the fourth quarter yesterday was a bit more dramatic than the Phils' exit the evening before. I'm appropriately bummed about the Phils, but the Giants, like the Titans, made all the plays required to win -- even if their lineup didn't look as shiny on paper. The only conceivable upside of the Phils' loss is that I can stop drinking and eating bar food five nights a week for baseball games. Wait, I'm not sure that's upside.
Only Vaguely Related To The Eagles And/ Or Even The NFL. My wife claims to have seen Gisele and Tom Brady's kid at the supermarket this morning. She reports that Gisele is "really tall."
Speaking Of, And We Don't Usually Post These, But. It was Halloween costume day at LP Field and a tough loss for us. Trick or treat.
IgglesBlog Suicide Pool Update. We're down to 26 entries still standing at the end of Week 7, with 15 brave soldiers going down this week. As you might expect, the Saints and Broncos claimed the most victims this week. If there was a way that picking the Broncos this week could somehow mean that you retroactively got more than one week wrong, I think I could get behind that. 59 points at home to a division rival (the Raiders no less?) -- in case you thought it was a tough week for Eagles fans, at least we didn't give up more than half a hundred to the Giants or something. Boldest picks of the week were kungfoo monkey robots who took the Pats (dogs on the road) as well as the tastefully titled Cromartie's Seed, who took the Bucs (and you get a shout-out for taking the Bucs no matter what).
All photos except the one up top by IgglesBlog photo stringer Joe Z, who was on the case in Nash Vegas this weekend. The one up top I just took from the Titans' site. They owe us at least that much.