Iggles Blog vs BountyBowl Bye Week Blogganza (#6)

Derek pwned me a bit yesterday afternoon, and then assured me that no one would be reading anything on the bye weekend anyway.  So that's pretty sweet.  

Let's go to the highlights: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5.   

*****

I didn't expect us to actually discuss the performance-enhancing drug thing at all.  I dunno.  This isn't something that tends to get me too spun up; do we feel betrayed by Lenny Dykstra, or are do we treasure our memories of the '93 Phillies?  And if we're talking about football, I mean, dude.  Even if these guys aren't on banned substances, they're clearly stretching the boundaries of natural human development.  They've chosen to play a hideously violent game, one which might bring them glory and riches, but which undoubtedly will remove some quality from their later years.  They're willing to carry extra bulk and smash into other dudes.  We can't see their faces out there anyway; if some of the killer robots want to use special fuel, well, I don't think it really ruins the TV show.

(Unless it's the Cowboys or Giants.  Then it's f*cking cheating.  But I guess I generally don't romanticize it all that much.)

Of course, it would be irresponsible to discuss performance-enhancing substances without noting that two players from the NY/ NJ Vodka-Red-Bulls were suspended on Thursday for using banned supplements.  This is MLS we're talking about here!  What will the children think?  (Both Philly guys, by the way.)  Seriously, this is bad news.  Luckily, they were both fined 10 percent of their salary; as my brother noted, that's like $4,000!

(What, we don't follow MLS?)

Far be it from me to dodge a question, I'll admit that I actually forgot that "least favorite Eagle" was in play.  I was hoping to debut a regular feature on this topic (no kidding, I was), so I'll give you a sneak preview: his name begins with an L, ends with an R, and in the middle there's a lot of "Orenzo Booke."  The tight end is obviously a close second (if only because he seems to be a much bigger jerk than Booker; Booker's just overmatched).

On to some of your points before my final volley of questions:

I don't understand in re: Sheldon Brown.  What leads you to believe he's only in it for himself?  Because he avoids the media-training cliches when talking about contracts?  The guy plays every single game and is by all appearances extremely irresponsible when it comes to contact.  You think he's 100 percent healthy every week?  Big hits don't get you contracts; gambling for picks does.  I bet Sheldon Brown has a lot of respect from the rest of the team.  And, frankly, I'd prefer it if you didn't continue to impugn his good name!

I'm glad your commenters gave you grief for the Nerdbirds.  As loud as that stadium is, and as much as Homlgren seems to be in AR's head, the Seahawks are a train wreck right now.  The Eagles had better win that game.

Please tell me that the MySpace story is true.  Seriously?  You really stalked Tony Hunt on MySpace?  That's fantastic.  Also, when are you going to get your ass on the Facebook?  We have a great officer position waiting for you when you do.

You missed my rather pessimistic point on the 36 Chambers of Brian Westbrook.  I don't doubt Westbrook's pride or his toughness.  My bigger concern is his health.   Are broken ribs going to heal quickly?  Does the rest of the league know that he's banged up in the mid-section?  I mean, I hope so.  He's the best player the Eagles have.  But I think we might be overly optimistic about the rate of his recovery.  I mean, I hope not.  I hope he's spending extra time in the hyperbaric chamber this week.  But we have to confront the fact that he might not be whole for a while.

Dude, you totaly dodged the McNabb question!  You're right to note that he hasn't had a bad stretch yet to prompt the inevitable larger conversation amongst the blathertariat, but I'm asking you now what you think.  Before the season, I certainly thought it was a done deal that this would be his final season in Philly.  Now I'm not so sure -- I think he has a shot to stay for a couple more seasons (if he so chooses).  Where are you landing on this topic?  You think he's still gone?

Also, we're both obviously complete nerds about the Football Outsiders thing -- what's your professional opinion on the Eagles being #1 in DVOA this week?  Hidden indicator that the Eagles might be better than we all think, or proof that Aaron Schatz and the boys might need to reconfigure their spreadsheet?  I obviously think it's the model's fault.  While they do a nice job of trying to create a taxonomy that understands that not all plays are created equal, it's obvious that the model doesn't capture the value of the half-dozen plays in a game that matter a ton -- and that the Eagles seem prone to screwing up.  Plays on the goal-line, big stops in the fourth quarter, sloppy stuff at the end of the first half: these seem to be themes every week.  Am I imagining things here?

It's also worth noting that I blame Andy Reid for those screwups.  Discuss!

Iggles Blog vs BountyBowl Bye Week Blogganza (#3)

Derek just fired off number three (#3).  I really hope David Akers doesn't read it!

See here for #1 and #2.

Iggles Blog vs BountyBowl Bye Week Blogganza (#5)

Dude, Derek, you're effing killing me with the quick response.  Seriously.  I can't keep up with that.

Uncle.  At least until tomorrow.

Bye Week Blogganza? You betcha.

And here you thought that we'd be taking the bye week off! 

Instead, we've decided to mix it up again with Derek from Igglesblog in what we're cautiously dubbing a Blogganza.  We would call it a blogstravaganza, but we're not quite sure we have a full ten parts in us this time around.  Still, we think we have enough material for a couple days of rantings and/ or musings.

Derek was gracious enough to kick off -- check out his opening salvo over at Iggleblog (which I hope you're reading regularly anyway; it really is the best one of these things going). 

The BountyBowl Guy Finishes Things Up (Part 10)

Right here.

Penultimate Postravaganza (Part 9)

Then we came to the end.  I'm tempted to do this entire post in the first person plural as a tribute, but then people would probably just think I was aping Will Leitch.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

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Gabe,

Since this is my last post in this little series, let me start by thanking you for the back-and-forth.  It's been fun.  Hope it's been entertaining to read as well.

Housekeeping first.  Yes, I admit the reputation of Eagles fans can, in the right situations, be rather cool.  Of the two dominant strains of Eagles' fandom -- 1) hard-core, 2) self-pitying -- [the former] is by far the more appealing. 

I just despise the tendency of national commentators to use that reputation as a crutch to score easy points.  It's lazy and intellectually weak-sauced.

With that said, I was amazed while watching the NBA playoffs to see how hard the Boston fans were rooting for Ray Allen during his struggles.  The place went nuts every time he managed so much as a bounce pass to an open teammate without turning the ball over.  Of course, Allen rebounded in a big way later in the playoffs and ended up being an important contributor to the championship.

One can't help but wonder if the same result would have occurred in a town where the only cheers he heard would have been when he walked back to the bench.

As for the arrogance thing, the key point I've tried to make is NOT that Reid / McNabb are any different than any other coach / QB pairing in this league.  I don't think it's possible to succeed at that level without going to bed every night feeling pretty cocky about how you do things.

The problem for Andy is that that's all we see from him.  All signs point to Reid being a good, (relatively) humble, interesting and humorous individual, it's just that he locks that part away any time the microphones are on.  I realize that's his way of coping with this job and also how he thinks he can best win football games, but the end result is that no one cuts him any slack based on how good a guy he is. 

I should mention at this point that I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS AT ALL.  I like Reid, I think he's an excellent coach and I hope he's here for the next 10 years.  But I think it explains why a guy who's won so many games in this town has to deal with the kind of crap he takes.

But let's consider your hypothetical and say he moves on after this season.  Who would I want to see as coach?  The answer, I think ... depends.

A couple years ago, I would have been right there with you on the Jon Gruden thing.  The guy has a great offensive mind, he's a perfect fit for a veteran team that needs a little bit of edge to get over the hump (see Bay, Tampa), and he would eat this town for lunch. 

My problem, however, is that 1) I'm not sure "veteran team needing an edge" is a good description of where this franchise is right now and 2) I think there's a very good chance Gruden would completely destroy Kevin Kolb.

Whatever Gruden's strengths may be, it's hard to argue that he hasn't completely jacked up his quarterback situation in Florida, to the point that he may only have been saved by the magic that is The Jeff Garcia Experience.  And now even Garcia is pissed at him. 

Do we really want to hand the keys to yet another promising young quarterback to Gruden, with the knowledge that it would likely lead to lots of jerking the guy around, playing AJ Feeley, benching AJ Feeley, and endless rumors about trying to lure McNabb back from Chicago?  I don't think so.

Bottom line:  while he might be the guy to give you the best crack at a championship right way, it could come at the cost of ruining your potential franchise quarterback for the next 10 years.  I'm not sure that's the smartest risk to take.

Jeff Fisher?  Meh.  I realize he's one of the apostles, but to me that's a blah choice.  Only if everyone else said no.

The Ryans?  I'll let you have your dreams.

As for my picks, I'll give you my top and bottom three.  First the no-way-in-hell-ers:

3.  Dick Vermeil.  You know the drumbeat would start.  I like Vermeil and I think he's a great coach, but I don't like the idea of picking a short-timer.  Stability on the sidelines is important.

2.  Brad Childress.  Looks to an outsider like all he's done is turn around a bottom-feeding franchise in Minnesota while also having the foresight to draft the best running back we've seen come out of college in quite some time.  So why does everyone in at least three states hate his guts?  Seems weird.  He's also not the kind of guy who passes the split-screen coach's test the Sports Guy is always talking about.

1.  Marty Mornhinweg.  I realize Andy Reid thinks he's a great coach.  Fine.  But to me he just seems like a pale imitation of Reid himself.  I'm a big fan of the original, I'm just not convinced that hiring the Mini Me version is the answer. 

Now, for the good ones, I'm a big fan of John Harbaugh as well.  Whatever it is that guys like Marty and Childress don't have, he seems to exude in spades.  But the problem is that he's not going to be available any time soon unless things completely blow up for him in his new gig ... which might change my opinion of him slightly as well.

3.  Jim Johnson.  I understand the problems with this choice.  You could even argue that by doing this you would be going down a notch at both the head coach and defensive coordinator positions.  But hear me out.

Do you think the Eagles have a good thing going and should strive for continuity?  Johnson gives you that.  He's been here forever, has the respect of every guy in the locker room, and wouldn't be looking to change things up too much.  He might even consider running the ball more often when he has a lead in the fourth quarter.

On the other hand, are you a little tired of the way Reid runs things?  Think the team would benefit from a guy with a bit more fire?  Well Jim Johnson is your man.  He's the one coach on the staff who will tell you point-blank which guy screwed up out there.  He's also got a reputation of being a hardass on players who don't do things the right way.  If Lurie is looking for a little bit more of a "bad cop" from his head coach, Johnson is the pick.

There's also something to be said for having earned your chance.

2.  Jason Garrett.  Yes.  I know.  But if we're just picking names out of a hat here, Garrett has to be in the mix.  Not only is he by all accounts a great offensive mind, he perfectly fits the mold of a guy you could hire and then set up for the next 10 years.  He's exactly the kind of coach I'd love to see Kevin Kolb play his career under.  And you can't underrate how bad this signing would be for the Cowboys.  That's a win-win-win all the way around.

1.  Bill Cowher.  And my number one guy is sitting out there right now, just waiting for a phone call.  Cowher is the perfect pick:

• Fits the franchise's self-image;
• Track record of success;
• Immediate respect from players;
• Has a ring and can tell fans to shut the hell up;
• Smash-mouth background that would play well in Philly but also be a nice change of pace for this team;
• Understands PA; and,
• Has his offensive coordinator already on staff.

The only thing I don't like about this choice is that I'm still hoping he'll go to Penn State instead.

And so with that, I'll let you have the last word... 

...unless my self-control in that regard is no better than it was in not responding to comments.

Iggles Blog Vs. BountyBowl Blogstravaganza (#9)

Derek has just issued his long, fond farewell to this Blogstravaganza of ours.  We'll miss you, dude.  Stay classy.

The other eight (8) parts: 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

And ... We're Backstravanganza (Part 7)

UPDATE: Gabe's response is up.

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Ok, I think I've now given Gabe enough time to recover that it's time to post this. 

Catch-up for the latecomers:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

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Gabe,

Very good, long, thoughtful post.  You raised many excellent points, all of which I'm going to ignore so I can focus on the true meat of what you wrote:  the psyche of our franchise quarterback, how we got to where we are, and what it means for the future.

I first want to say thank you.  As someone who spends most of his time blogging about the ways in which football fans (both here and there) are wrong in how they view the Birds, I don't typically have the opportunity to defend Philly fans and how they/we root for our teams.  This is a nice change of pace.

Let's start with how you said Donovan's problems were all our fault:

"It’s just obvious that this was never the right place for him.  I don’t think he’ll ever forget the boos on draft day.  Never." 

See, one of the things that drives me so nuts about all the commentary regarding Philly sports fans is that people always act like we're the ONLY FANS EVER to act in a manner that would be out of place at, say, a somewhat fancy tea party. 

I'm sorry I don't have the cite handy, but I remember reading an article in one of the local papers a couple years ago that pointed out if a fan in Philadelphia -- rather than San Diego -- had thrown a syringe onto the field at Barry Bonds, we'd never hear the end of it, like that stupid teenage Santa Claus.  But because it happened in Southern Califoria, it was just, "oh, one crazy fan, how about that."

It's the same thing with Donovan getting booed on draft day.  The last couple years, ESPN has run a 90-second package during the draft that is just Jets fans booing their team's first round picks.  (Many of which were truly awful.)  You could fill up entire newspapers with stories of fanbases furious with the picks their team made, in every sport. 

But because it's Philadelphia, and because we have that reputation, it's somehow different.  And the fact that a guy got booed nine years ago because a bunch of people who had never seen him play happened to think he was the wrong choice is not only some sort of permanent stain on our record, but also an excuse for why he just never really felt comfortable here.

Furthermore -- and this is the part that really burns me -- the fans weren't actually booing McNabb.  This is one of the things outsiders just never get about Philly fans.  Just because a guy happens to be on the field / in the batter's box / on-stage at the moment we're booing, that doesn't always mean we're booing him.  It's always (ok, usually) more complicated than that.

In 1999, for example, no one in Philadelphia cared two bits about McNabb.  He was just a guy our team might pick instead of the guy we (yes, shamefully, I was in the Ricky camp) wanted.  Paul Tagliabue could have announced our selection as "Jesus Christ, Nazareth Vocational College" and people STILL would have booed. 

You obviously understand this completely.  As you mentioned in an email to me this morning:

"Was at CBP for the Phils yesterday.  You gotta love booing Stephen Drew for being related to JD Drew.  Awesome."

It's the same thing with McNabb.  We weren't booing him -- we were booing NotRickyWilliams.  They just happened to be the same person.

And to be fair, given the recent history, it wasn't exactly a stretch for us to believe the Eagles had just hired yet another coach who would screw everything up.  We didn't know then that Reid had his act together.

So that covers the booing, but what about your next point:

"Being the quarterback of the Eagles, much less the NON-WHITE quarterback of the Eagles is easily one of the top-five worst jobs in American sports. "

So playing quarterback in a town with passionate fans, solid ownership, a stable coaching staff and plenty of talent around you is somehow one of the five worst jobs in American sports?

Are you sure you hadn't started the festivities a little early when you wrote that?

It's certainly true that there are easier places to play sports than Philadelphia.  Evidently in St. Louis you can suck for 10 years without hearing even so much as a nervous cough after your fourth strikeout of the day.  Philly isn't ... like that.

But there are plenty of guys who thrive in Philadelphia and the atmosphere here.  Look at Brian Dawkins, Jeremiah Trotter (never should have left, dude) and Brian Westbrook.  All of these guys are/were great players who seemed to feed off the emotion of the town and never ended up getting too bruised from the experience.

They all have something else in common as well. 

Speaking of St. Louis, doesn't the Scott Rolen case pretty much prove the point that if you're a headcase in one place, you'll be a headcase everywhere else too?  I mean, sure, he had some issues here that were outside his control, but then he went to the land of cornfields and low expectations and still couldn't keep his act together. 

No, McNabb's real problem with the Philly fans is that he thinks he's better than us.  That's the one absolutely unforgivable sin in this town.  We can smell that shit a mile away and we don't like it one bit. 

It's the same problem Andy Reid has.  Every NFL coach is convinced he's always the smartest guy in the room.  That's the only way to survive in that profession.  But most other successful coaches give us other things to go on to round out the picture.  Buddy Ryan hated the Cowboys as much -- or more -- that we did.  (And it was a real hatred, not a fake, we-happen-to-be-in-the-same-division happenstance.)  Dick Vermeil cared so much that boy we just cared right along back with him. 

Andy Reid gives us zippy. 

He sits up there, basically tells us he on top of things so we don't need to worry, and never gives us even a glimpse at the rest of who he is unless something happens to his kids and it's time to get a feel-good article out there about what the family is going through. 

Not to go all after school special here, but if Reid would actually come out of his shell once in awhile, he might find he no longer needed it as much.

As for Donovan, the fact that he's actually right about what he thinks doesn't help.  Nor does it matter.  

Blogstravaganza Update

Gabe is wrapping up kind of a big deal weekend, so the schedule is going to shift today.  I'll have my response up around mid-day and then we'll see how quickly he can recover.

Yes, the honor of Philly fans will be defended.

Iggles Blog Vs. BountyBowl Blogstravaganza (#7)

After a charming weekend, it's game-on again with Derek over at IgglesBlog.  His latest is here.  I'm doing a bit of a cleanse right now (must rinse away the shame of the 36 ounces of steak I ate) but should have something up and running later tonight. 

The story of the film so far:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6